Every so often I let myself get bogged down in a swamp of details. Lately the particular detail keeping me awake at night (but not, ironically, in the middle of the afternoon) is the fact that I have only six company checks left. I ordered new checks, oh, two weeks ago? I guess. Something like that.

Of course, I should have ordered checks six weeks ago, when I started to run low. Now the number of the last check in the checkbook is perilously close to the next check I will write. Which I will try not to do for as long as possible.

It makes it a little easier when lack of checks converges with lack of money in the account. The Boss had me write a check today that he knew we couldn’t cover, but he also had me include a note not to deposit it without our okay. But still, that’s one more check I don’t have. I hope the new ones come before payroll next week. It takes at least ten checks to do company payroll, and (as I mentioned) I have six.

Also, the Boss is going to pick up a big, big payment (six-figure variety) tomorrow, and he’ll want me to pay a lot of bills with it. And I’ll want to pay bills, especially the ones that are going to create service charges and late fees if I wait any longer. I’m getting nervous. Sometimes I’m feeling panicky, but then I lie down and it passes.

In the worst case, I can go to the bank and explain my stupidity to them, and maybe they’ll print me up some temporaries. But really, it usually doesn’t take more than two weeks for a check order to be processed and delivered, so I expect the replacement checks tomorrow. Really I do.

I’ve been trying all day not to let these waves of panic paralyze me so that I can’t get anything else done. It hasn’t worked all that well, to tell the truth. But I probably needed that hour nap at 2 pm more than I needed to wade through the oozing paperwork. This will all seem like a bad dream once those checks get here.