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This isn’t working out the way I hoped it would. I have all this time to get things done, but I can’t seem to keep at it. We’re just not close enough to the deadline yet, I guess. Or maybe it’s the fact that next week will be the third four-day week out of the last four. (Which doesn’t mean I work only four days, of course. But the fact that nobody else is working kind of affects my attitude.)
Anyway, I’m being lazy. I’m getting through exactly what I have to get through, day after day, to keep the companies running. The tax payments that are due next Tuesday have been made, but the forms that have to be completed by the end of the month have barely been started. I can’t work without some urgency hanging over me, and that’s all there is to it.
If only I could fool myself. But it’s the same principle that keeps me from being a morning person. “Just pretend you have to get up early.” Well, I don’t have to get up early, and I don’t want to, so I don’t do it. And I don’t have to get anything done before the deadline. I want to, but I can’t make myself put aside something more interesting just to get a head start.
Maybe that’s the trouble. Maybe I have too many interesting projects on my plate, and I don’t have what it takes to push them aside so I can do something a little less fascinating, even if it’s more critical in the big picture. It’s the reason I don’t bake. If I could make pastry, I’d never have bean salad again. I’d be eating cakes and pies and tarts and stuff all the time. | 
